![](../images/ash_bigB.jpg) |
Aishwarya
Rai with Amitabh Bachhan. |
Life may be one BIG Drama, and we, character in it.... But....LIVE
IT.....Every moment in it !!?!!
Dad was sailing constantly. So mostly, it was
mum, brother and me" Even as a child, I was a dreamer. I conjured up my own
dreams and created a world of my own. At the same time, I was this sensible
kid. In the family, I always spent more time with my aunts and uncles than
with my cousins. It was not like a kid trying to be grown up. It was a
comfortable atmosphere. My parents had always encouraged open communication.
Between the four of us - mom, dad, my brother and I - we were a very
closely-knit family unit. Grown-up things were discussed; I don't mean the
birds and bees; but family matters, relationships, friends… My dad was on
ship, sailing constantly. So, most of the time, it was mum, brother and me.
I always behaved more grown up than my brother. Even today, people are
surprised that he is older than me. It's very funny. Even in school, my
juniors, my classmates and some of my seniors would so naturally discuss
their problems with me. I was a very talkative child. I used to speak better
than other kids my age. I was always ahead of my time. I got into these
little conversations with people and I was convinced that I was putting my
point across, even if they were perceived as arguments. "I loved to watch
Chayageet" As a child, I was exposed to a lot of music at home. Various
kinds of music. My brother, who is 3 years older to me, obviously put on
what he liked. There were no CDs at that time. He'd buy some tapes, he'd
record some… pop music, mainly. And my mother used to listen to old Hindi
songs. Later on, I also learnt Hindustani Classical and Carnatic music. I
loved music and dance. I trained in Bharatanatyam too. I was inclined
towards the fine arts right from the beginning. We watched films as kids,
but not excessively. It wasn't part of our normal routine. There was
television and the Sunday movies, which were the big events of the weekend.
After that, you started feeling guilty about your homework for Mondays. I
loved to watch Chayageet on Doordarshan and all the Hindi movies. I was
enthralled by the magic of cinema even then. Videos were new and it was a
big thing to watch the latest movies on them, whenever we could. Films
weren't a taboo. They just weren't allowed to be the centrepoint of our
lives, just like we weren't allowed to go crazy over chocolates or going to
games parks.
"If the occasion demands that I be a chandelier, I will be so" Adolescence
is a strange phase. One goes through all kinds of transformations. This was
that stage when I'd constantly get into fights with my brother, not because
he was my elder brother, but because I now felt on par with him. When I was
getting into college, I thought, "Uh-oh, Elder-Brother Syndrome is going to
take over big time!" But after a while, amazingly, we became the best of
friends. I was never into fashion really. I don't know if I still am. I was
always easy about dressing. If the occasion demands that I be a chandelier,
I will be so, impassionately. But the kind of clothes I wear personally is a
very different matter. Comfort is the main criterion, and of course, moods.
But my clothes are never extravagant. In college, I was very simple in my
dressing - just jeans and a shirt or a salwar kameez or something. Biology
and Zoology were my favourite subjects, but I didn't see myself making a
career in medicine. One needs a kind of dedication for such careers which,
at that time, I thought I wouldn't be able to put in. I took up architecture
and then developed a love for it as I was studying it. "The Miss World
contest gave me a chance to discover myself" At the time of the Miss India
contest, I was 19, just past my Class XII. I was as new as the other 20-odd
contestants, but I was already known as Aishwarya Rai, the model. People
therefore thought I was Miss Know All because of my experience. I spoke on
the stage for the first time during the contest. I was feeling very
conscious and people mistook this for attitude and restraint in expression.
The Miss World contest also gave me a chance to discover myself. I was there
in Sun City for one month with people I didn't know and who didn't know me
at all. I was trying to see which qualities of mine would create an
impression on these people. I think I found and recognised myself there.
I've had my fair share of attention right from childhood. That's why I have
never felt the need to grab it. In fact, I almost work at underplay. If you
see my body language, I always have one raised shoulder. It means that I'm
taking things in, listening to what others have to say, instead of screaming
for attention. "I love being in films" I am enjoying every moment of being
in films. It's addictive. I was offered films in my modelling days, but I
didn't give acting a shot then because it meant compromising on my studies.
The only time I almost gave in to the temptation was in December 1993, when
Toy (Dharmesh Darshan) spoke to me about Raja Hindustani. But then, I
entered the Miss India contest. Even Rajiv Rai had called me during Mohra.
When I look back, I wonder how those films would have been if I had done
them. My life would probably not have been the same.
I don't need to pile my plate" Very few people seem to recognise the fact
that I am still a newcomer to the film industry. The media has slammed me
for the failure of my films and accused me of having manipulated my career
to be able to work with the right people. At the same time, when I turned
down Indra Kumar's Mann, Sooraj Barjatya's Hum Saath-Saath Hain, Sunny Deol'
s London and Priyadarshan's film, people said I was crazy. I am not guilty
of any manipulation. I knew that I couldn't do justice to many films at the
same time, though they could have done wonders for my career. Some actresses
do 10-12 films a year, but I stick to four. I want to complete my pending
projects before I take on new ones. I know that here, people want to be
secure for the next five years. So they take on everything they are offered.
I'm not insecure. I know the films I have on hand are enough, they'll get
made. After that, I will sign new films. I'd love to work with a lot of
directors. But at the moment, the table's well laid. I don't need to pile my
plate. The assurance that there are more items on the menu is good enough. I
love films. I love being here. There are no regrets, no complaints. Once in
a while, I let my hair down. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel the
need for time out. When I feel the need for a break, it shows. People give
it to me before I can ask. The pace has been frenetic these last five years,
but this roller-coaster ride has been a conscious choice. I've had a taste
of everything… college life, campus rounds, the catwalk, the Miss World
blitz, and now films. It's been perfect. "B(e) positive is not just a blood
group" I'm still in touch with my friends and family. I make time for them.
Time has become even more precious, but I use it well. How can I not keep in
touch with friends? They're the ones who constantly remind me that I'm me.
Aishwarya. I always say, "B(e) positive is not just a blood group." Cinema
is not just make-believe, it is a real world too. If your attitude is right,
it does not matter who you are -- the director, producer, the main lead or
the set in-charge. Everyone speaks the same language. Bambaiyya. It is a
wonderful world and the emphasis is on wonder. You get to live so many
characters. All the people you may never meet in real life, you meet in your
films. Once, while shooting abroad, we were dancing in the middle of the
street. My co-star was feeling ridiculous. "Why are we doing this?" he
cribbed constantly. I told him, "Look at it this way. You can use this as an
excuse to do anything really stupid and get away with it. All that you can't
do in real life, you can express through films. Here you can fool around and
enjoy it."
- Aishwarya Rai.
This autobiographical note has been taken
from
http://www.celebwelove.com/Aishwarya_Rai/biography.html. |